Don't be so Morbid
When I fly stupid thoughts pop into my head. These are generally of the "what if?" variety. When you're sitting on the plane, bored, and you've thumbed through the In Flight magazine 6 times, and you can't get to your carry on bags because they're in the overhead locker, this is what generally happens. As I sat staring out the window coming into Brisbane, we hit a bit of turbulence and went straight into a cloud bank. Of course, this means instant death.
Well, actually it doesn't. I've flown enough, and watched enough scary aircraft crash shows to know that the chances of being killed on a plane are pretty slim. Its just when it happens, it really does happen in a big way. So as I sat there, contemplating my existence, I began thinking of what I would do if the plane really was going down, and I had to ring Anth and say good-bye. Of course, she wouldn't answer the phone, so I'd have to leave a message.
When I got home, and told Anth this and asked her if it was Morbid she said "Hell Yeah, you dickhead!" This was followed up with, "Don't put it in the blog, 'cause its supposed to be lighthearted." She's right. Her advice was that if I had to say anything, it would be "Avenge Me." to use a true Homerism. Here are two of my favorites from the Simpsons...
In Homer vs. The Eighteenth Amendment when Homer is going out to make illegal booze, as he and Bart walk out he turns to Marge and says: "We're going out, Marge! If we don't come back, avenge our deaths!", to which she replies, "All right".
In Tales from the Public Domain when they do a take off of Hamlet, the following exchange represents one you could guarantee I would have with the kids if I were to die, and then come back as a ghost!
Well, actually it doesn't. I've flown enough, and watched enough scary aircraft crash shows to know that the chances of being killed on a plane are pretty slim. Its just when it happens, it really does happen in a big way. So as I sat there, contemplating my existence, I began thinking of what I would do if the plane really was going down, and I had to ring Anth and say good-bye. Of course, she wouldn't answer the phone, so I'd have to leave a message.
When I got home, and told Anth this and asked her if it was Morbid she said "Hell Yeah, you dickhead!" This was followed up with, "Don't put it in the blog, 'cause its supposed to be lighthearted." She's right. Her advice was that if I had to say anything, it would be "Avenge Me." to use a true Homerism. Here are two of my favorites from the Simpsons...
In Homer vs. The Eighteenth Amendment when Homer is going out to make illegal booze, as he and Bart walk out he turns to Marge and says: "We're going out, Marge! If we don't come back, avenge our deaths!", to which she replies, "All right".
In Tales from the Public Domain when they do a take off of Hamlet, the following exchange represents one you could guarantee I would have with the kids if I were to die, and then come back as a ghost!
Homer: Hamlet! Avenge me!
Bart/Hamlet: Dad?
Homer: Yes! I've returned from the dead!
Bart/Hamlet: Looks like you returned from the buffet. (chuckles)
Homer: Why you little! (tries to strangle Bart, but his ghost hands go through his neck) D'oh!
So I'm not going to write what I would have really said. Its suffice to say, "Avenge Me!" works just fine!
Ciao for Now, Comicly Morbid Angry Dad.
posted by Wes at 10:54 pm
2 Comments:
You know its really funny but I have those thoughts too. I really didn't have a problem with flying until I worked at the airport.....I guess its true what they say Ignorance is Bliss!
that's a funny post man :))
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